Do you want to know what hiring managers really want in a job candidate?
Here’s a letter that I have composed with words you can trust.
Dear job candidate,
Be gentle with yourself. I know you are sincere and earnest. I know that your nervousness is a reflection of your desire to make a good impression, to show me that you care and that you want to do a good job. I know that you don’t want to put on false airs but you want to show your best self, the you that is confident and poised, the you that can sit up straight and get to work. Somewhere you got the idea that you have to be perfect, that there is a right answer and a wrong answer, and that I am going to be looking for you to do and say the wrong thing.
I don’t want you to be a robot. I know you are a person
Stop trying to make an impression. Consider the idea that we might RELATE to each other!
Stop trying to be perfect. That’s only going to keep you from breathing and being natural. (Just show me how you work to be better and smarter, just tell me what you strive for.)
I want to know you so that I can tell if we can work together, so that I can tell if we can communicate and work through challenges, so that I know what does truly excite you about this job and this company and dare I say, to working with me!
I want you to settle down in your chair and take your time, knowing that I simply want to know how you think, how you approach problems, what you do when you are faced with challenges, and what will help you do well were you to work with me and us.
Fitting in does not mean fitting into a box! It means connecting to us and our culture. It means speaking a language similar to ours.
You have a personality! How can I help you to trust that I want to experience it?
You have values! Oh, how I’d love to know what matters to you and what drives you to work harder and better.
You have vision! Really, I bet you do. You have an idea how this job fits into your goals. Maybe a little bit?
Here’s the most important thing, dear candidate. Someday, you and I might really know each other. This interview is the start of our relationship. Our first date, so to speak. That’s why we dressed up and brushed our hair. That’s why we are taking more care with how we talk (yes, I dropped my tendency to swear). That’s why I want you to slow down and enunciate. That helps me take in your words and digest what you have to say. That’s why I want you to know that being believable and present are the most important qualities for you to convey right now.
Believable. The more I can sense you are speaking from your values and heart, the more I TRUST you. Right away. That’s why nerves and imperfections are just fine!
Be present. Try to look at me, listen, respond and breathe. Maybe sigh!
Be clear. Oh yes, it makes a difference if you know what your point is. So take your time, and make one point at a time. The clearer you are, the easier it is for me to know about you, your skills and your accomplishments.
PLEASE KNOW THAT I AM NOT OUT TO GET YOU! I am not a judge. Nor am I perfect. I happen to know more than you do about this job and this organization and our needs. I know what’s worked and what hasn’t. I know about our group chemistry.
Try to look at me with kindness and interest, too. That will help me relate to you.
Warmly and sincerely, your interviewer
PS – a few words from the candidate to the interviewer
Dear Interviewer,
Please remember that you are ONLY interviewing – and checking me out! I am checking you out, too. If I don’t like your vibe or your questions, I’m not gonna work with you. Your job, is to be a smart interviewer and a strong observer, and to use the interview to learn about me and see how well we connect and relate. The more you look at me with warmth and presence, the easier it’ll be for me to show you my real self, the self you’d likely get to know if we were working together!
Remember that there is a give and take. Listen well. Let’s get to it!
Warmly and somewhat timidly, your job candidate