Imagine yourself speaking before a group. It’s your turn to share who you are and to make a strong first impression. Instead of standing center stage, you stand a little off to the side, tilting your body away from center. You look like you might be about to leave the stage. Another person takes his turn. He backs away from the audience almost leaning against the far wall. Now another person comes up. She stands in the center of the room and chatters on at some length making one point, two points, and now a third. She hasn’t really taken a breath! Next is a man who is speaking loudly. He is clear and audible. Some might say he was boastful. As he comes to a close, his voice softens and he says, “but that part of my work isn’t what people want”. Hmm. Why did he quiet down? Another person comes up. This person looks like he is trying to fit into a straw. He’s had huge success but his presence says disappear!
These are snapshots from the Interview Club when we worked on Introductions. Yes, everyone got in front of the room and delivered a short introduction.
None of us needs training in public speaking or interviewing to know what happened. There were signs of second guessing, diminished confidence, maybe unease at being seen. Body and voice communicated what words did not:I’m small, what I want to do doesn’t matter, you don’t really want to hear me, I’m not really ready to talk in front of others, if I brag, I’ll be too much.
What you don’t know is that every one of these people had been speaking with strength and conviction minutes before they came to the stage. We could feel their enthusiasm, hear their ambition. We knew they had strong values. We knew they were successful. We knew they were interesting. We felt their aliveness. We wanted to know more about them, what they have done and what they want to do next.
Public speaking is as much pausing and posture as it is speaking.I’m going to offer a simple acronym to support your speaking skills. Try it out. Breathe it. Play with it when you’re in the grocery line. And when you feel ready, take it to a small stage where you stand in front of others.
P is for Presence.Take some time to really feel in your body what that means. A client recently showed me a photo of five large women in bathing suits looking directly to the camera. They were big, they were all there and their postures and expressions said, I am here. Fully here. They were not daring us to look. They were telling us that they had substance, and not only with their voluptuous bodies but also with their absolutely straight ahead look us in the eye gaze. That’s presence. Full on. Face front. Direct. Substantial.
A is for Audience. You are talking to an audience. Before you develop your talk or your interview responses, find out who they are and what matters to them. Think about what is relevant, important, interesting. Think about how you can connect with them. And then when you speak, speak to connect, not to be seen in your brilliance (!) but to be conversing and building a relationship.
U is for Understandable. Speak to be understood. Comprehended. You have a point. You have things to emphasize. Be coherent. Stay with one or two ideas. Don’t meander and tell us your whole resume. Rather, give us a cohesive picture and example. Don’t use jargon or cliches.
S is for Slow it down.You need to speak slowly and articulate your words. Try it out in an exaggerated way. Notice what happens when you articulate. When you’re slow and clear, we can hear your words and digest them. It’s easy to know what you are saying. It’s clear that you want to be heard because you are TAKING TIME and VALUING YOUR WORDS.
E is for Enthusiasm.If you’re interested and energized, we will feel it. We will want to know more about you. Consider the opposite. If you’re down, mumbling, collapsed, negative … you are telling us you’re not worth getting to know. But, when you light up and tell us what interests you or what you’re interested in learning more about or your vision, well we get excited too.
Put these tips together and you have PAUSE!
PAUSING IS the most important tool in all public speaking.
Pausing to breathe. Pausing to punctuate. Pausing to give your mind time to recover, to let your heart slow down, to feel your feet on the floor. Don’t ever think that radio silence is a killer. It’s fine when you are face to face. We all need space to think and reflect. We also know people get nervous. Chances are that when you PAUSE, we get a chance to digest what you’ve said and also get a chance to breathe and relax which is something we all want to do!
Public speaking is public.You are speaking to an audience, not retreating or leaning away from one!
Public speaking is speaking. So that we can hear you, so we know what energizes you, so we understand your main points.
Public speaking is all things voice– audible, clear, slow and deliberate, punctuated.
Public speaking is a practice.You don’t start off being a perfect speaker or interviewer. You start off by being a humble human who knows she has something to offer. So, keep practicing and remember to PAUSE!